By Nicky Reid aka Comrade Hermit
Finally, mercifully, it’s twenty-hundred and twenty-one, dearest motherfuckers. The year of our lord Satan, 2020, is finally fucking over and all around America there are signs of life. It’s a brand new spanking day for democracy, because 2021 doesn’t just bring an end to 2020, it brings an end to the tyranny of the Trump era. That nasty little quarter decade will magically be no more. Poof! Like waking from a four year nightmare. We’re back to square one. After four long years of dayglo orange madness, four long years of thuggish knuckle-dragging and boorish dick wagging, after four years of petty dog-whistle white supremacy, the nightmare is over and America has been saved. Saved by another thuggish, knuckle-dragging, dick-wagging, petty dog-whistle white supremacist. No! No, that’s negativity. That’s 2020 talking. No more cynicism. It’s a new day in America. It’s a new day in America. It’s a new day in America. Say it with me now.
Besides this whole thing is much bigger than Biden. That old honky gangster is just a transitional president. He’s simply holding open the door for a dynamic and diverse cabinet of revolutionary new thinkers. More women, more Queer people, more people of color, more people like you and me. More minorities than we’ve ever fucking seen before. It’s like a goddamn Barnie and Friends reunion up in this bitch. Everywhere you look, it’s a first. First this. First that. Who can be cynical about a new day in America when you have the first bisexual quadriplegic cabinet member, who worked for Raytheon, or the first blind Sikh cabinet member, who worked for Raytheon, or the first dyslexic Jamaican bobsledder, who worked for Raytheon. Wait a fucking minute? What the fuck? This is just the same goddamn shit. If it’s such a brand new goddamn day in America, then how come everybody still fucking works for Raytheon or Goldman goddamn Sacks? I think we’ve been had here.
Well, what do you fucking expect when you switch one racist old bastard for another? America is submerged in institutional racism. You have to be Tucker Carlson not to realize that. It’s hardwired into our DNA. We spent an entire summer getting our face shoved into this reality by Black kids in the streets, then we go and vote for the motherfucker who ghost wrote the new Jim Crow with Bill Clinton and we’re shocked to get more racist fucking bullshit in a rainbow package? ‘But what about Kamala Harris? Isn’t she inspiring?’ No, dearest motherfuckers, she’s way worse. In almost gleeful spite of her racial heritage, Kamala built a career on sticking it to other, less lucky, minorities. Kamala isn’t the new face of democracy. She’s the new face of racism. A very special brand of bigotry called inclusion.
Donald Trump represented the last gasp of the old brand of American racism. The blunt, white-is-might-and-might-is-right brand of white supremacy that openly bathes itself in it’s own self-assured superiority. The racism of Muslim bans and flaming border moats. The racism of bombing the shit out of “them” and taking their oil. The kind of racism you encounter on a walker with two tennis balls at the gift shop of your local Cracker Barrel. That “Hey faggot, get out of my way!” brand of bigotry loudly splayed by crude nightmare men like Strom Thurmond and LBJ. The kind of motherfuckers Joe Biden use to golf with between war crimes. But that era is over. The Trump Administration was more than likely its last fart. Old Joe plays a new game of golf now, with a whole new brand of bigots.