There are a lot of people who listen to Andrew Huberman, the Stanford neuroscientist who has built a surprisingly massive following with his rigorous, detailed podcast investigations into the workings of the mind and body. On his highly credentialed advice, his fans plunge themselves in cold water, do breathing exercises, and regulate their dopamine levels, all in service of a promise that has been made by countless wellness practitioners: that with self-control comes self-improvement. But as New York’s Kerry Howley discovered in reporting this devastating exposé of the real Dr. Huberman, that desire for control can often mask darker urges and needs, which invariably bubble up no matter how hard we try to suppress them.