Anti-Imperialism/Foreign Policy

Joe Biden’s Fabulous Fool’s Peace

By Nicky Reid aka Comrade Hermit

Exile in Happy Valley

Oh sweet lord Satan, is this it? Is this really how it ends? With Joe Biden struggling to pronounce Pashtun words on badly shuffled cue cards. Is this it? After twenty long years that could only accurately be described as goddamned, is this finally mercifully it? Twenty years! Twenty years in Afghanistan! Has it really only been twenty years? It feels more like forty or four hundred. Twenty years. Twenty years of drone strikes and bombing hospitals and wedding parties. Twenty years of digging graves for men who came home broken but alive. Twenty years of propping up dope lords, rapists, and pederasts. Twenty years of insisting that such beasts were moderates in the business of women’s lib. Twenty years of stacking corpses too high to accurately count the dead. Higher than those merciless mountains standing like gallows made from god’s serrated fangs. Twenty years of the longest war in America’s storied history of geostrategic bloodletting.

And now you say it’s over? Poof! Just like that. With a wave of Lady Liberties extinguished torch, with a wave of Joe Biden’s bony finger, this is how it ends? With that sad broken old fool of a death merchant announcing that he may be the fourth president to preside over this atrocity but he will also be the last. And just like that, on September 11, 2021, this forever nightmare is over. Yeah, I’m not fucking buying it either.

For starters, this plan carries the bizarre distinction of being a peace deal that violates a preexisting peace deal. Donald Trump’s diplomatic wunderkind, Zalmay Khalilzad broke his back doing back flips over buzz saws in Doha to get the Taliban killing machine to agree to a cease fire, and for an entire year, those grizzled imperium slayers sustained from murdering a single solitary pig-dog American based on the promise that we would finally fuck off by May 1, 2021. It was all set and ready to go. All the work had already been done. And Biden just drops in and wipes his ass with the thing, and for what? Another four months and a photo-op? You’re gonna put our precious boys and girls in uniform on the chopping block for that? Why? Seriously, what the literal fuck?

But that’s not all folks! Biden’s little speech, and that is indeed all this peace plan amounts too, a speech from a killer in Depends, promised the removal of all US and NATO coalition troops. It said absolutely nothing about the Pentagon’s 13,000 contract killers. It said nothing about the unknown number of CIA agents and black-ops operatives active in country. It said nothing about the lethal air war that kills more women and children than all the M4’s and AK’s combined. Peace? What fucking peace? This thing that has been pompously promised to us isn’t peace. It’s a lie. Fool’s peace. If I were just a little more paranoid, I might suspect that this deal was designed to fail. Then again, is that really so far fetched considering the Biden regime’s hundred day history of duplicitous diplomacy?

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