Exile in Happy Valley
White Guilt is a very serious affliction in this country. Its symptoms include cultural appropriation, political correctness, and obsessive NPR consumption. Fall is peak White Guilt season, wedged between our country’s most cherished celebrations of genocide, Columbus Day and Thanksgiving. A common misconception is that White Guilt is a mental illness. While it can cause delusions in more severe cases, White Guilt is actually a completely natural response to conspicuous consumption, particularly when this addiction to material garbage is built on an ancient Indian burial ground.
Lets face it people, like it or not, this country’s grotesque surplus of wealth would be scientifically impossible without a veritable banquet of holocausts spanning three continents and the entire Western Hemisphere. Scores of tribes in North and South America and Africa were reduced to cinder to create a level of concentrated wealth in Western Europe and its bastard breakaway states that is downright unnatural and white people on both sides of the Atlantic continue to enjoy the luxuries that this legacy of brutality provides us. Luxuries like slowly murdering ourselves with trans fats while others starve and declaring it a holiday. So if you’re white, you probably should feel a little bit guilty. Our ancestors did some dicked up shit, even mine. Though they may have came to this country as white niggers escaping their own holocaust on potato boats, my Irish Catholic kin still earned their right to whiteness by whooping on school buses full of black kids as good as any Catholic bashing WASP could.
So we’ve zeroed in on the cause of white guilt, now how about the cure if there even is one? The prescription currently preferred by most milquetoast, limp-wristed, liberal, sweater vest jockies is some form of charity. Whether this means cutting checks to the Southern Poverty Law Center or voting for extravagant welfare state packages, honkies seem convinced that they can buy their way out of rape like Kobe fucking Bryant. This doesn’t work. However well intentioned, forking over fists full of cash to poor people does nothing but make them dependent on the same kind of hierarchy that imprisoned them in the first place. Africa doesn’t need food, they need farms that aren’t owned by Monsanto and more than anything they need the bloodsucking monkey of Western Imperialism off their fucking back. So unless you can give them debt forgiveness save your money.