, ESPN
Johnny Depp called me from France on Sunday night and asked what I knew about Osama bin Laden.
“Because I’m terrified of him,” he said. “All of France is terrified. … I freaked out and rushed to the airport, but when I got there my flight was canceled. All flights to the U.S. were canceled. People went crazy with fear.”
“Join the club,” I told him, “Almost everybody went crazy over here.”
“Never mind that,” he said. “Who won the Jets-Colts game?”
“There was no game,” I said. “All sports were canceled in this country — even ‘Monday Night Football.’ “
“No!” he said, “That’s impossible! I’ve never known a Monday night without a game on TV. What is the stock market doing?”
“Nothing yet,” I said, “It’s been closed for six days.”
“Ye gods,” he muttered. “No stock market, no football — this is Serious.”
